Thursday, March 17, 2011

WHAT? I don't need a hearing aid, talk louder.



I have been saying that for years, but it seems I did need a hearing aid. Not something I wanted to admit to, I did not want to be a deaf old geezer, vanity again.

Everybody in the family has been after me,
“Dad you need a hearing aid.”
“Lower the TV, it is too loud,”
I was hearing this for years. I was convinced my wife was whispering from the kitchen to make me crazy, people spoke softly so I couldn’t hear; paranoia was setting in as well.

Instead of accepting that maybe I might be a little hard of hearing, I was convinced everybody was out to make me believe I was. The conspiracy theory was alive and well…they are out to get me; it might even be a government plot.

A few years ago my kids got me an old hearing aid, those big horns that you stick in your year to magnify sounds. It was a joke, but not really…I guess it was a huge hint.

I went for a hearing test four years ago, took about three hours. I thought I did pretty well until they told me I missed about half of the sounds. Both ears are bad, but in completely opposite ways, right hears upper sounds, left, just the opposite. Not only would I be an old geezer with a hearing aid, I would be an old geezer with two hearing aids. Screw it, let everybody speak louder, there is a volume button on the TV after all.

The complaints continued same as always, the whispering continued. I had to accept, it was me, and I had to do something. I went for another hearing test. The only good thing was that it was exactly the same, as before, it was not getting worse. This time the doctor did not recommend that I wear two hearing aids, one would do.
It could have been technical progress by the hearing aid companies, or the doctor figured one may not be perfect, but it would be better than nothing.

I did it, I got one…it is tiny and not noticeable at all. I even got the piece behind my ear the same color as my hair,
Old geezer silver. What amazed me were the colors, somebody is wearing a purple hearing aid.

Now, how does this work? I have to confess, I do not wear it always, I do not hear the difference, but the whispering from the kitchen has stopped and the volume on the TV seems to be much too loud.

The crazy thing is I don’t seem to be as pissed off as much and the word WHAT is not used nearly as much.

Little by little I will use it on a more regular basis, later I may even get a purple one for my other ear.